Dimentio's Secret
by Random Dawn 14
Summary: Dimentio has a secret, and there's only one person he can trust enough to tell it to. Rated T because Mr. L is half naked the whole time. Crackfic
"Ah, I've been waiting for you, Mr. L."

Mr. L jumped nearly a foot in the air upon hearing the familiar voice as he entered his room. Having just taken a shower, he had been so focused on getting a pair of clean clothes that he hadn't even noticed the presence of another person in his room until said person spoke to him. As his heart rate slowed to a normal pace it began to dawn on Mr. L that aside from the towel wrapped around his waist he was naked. Trying not to blush, he glanced down and found that even after jumping so suddenly the towel was still in place. Relieved, he folded his armed across his chest and glared at his visitor, who was sitting on his bed.

"What the Underwhere are you doing in my room, Dimentio?"

Dimentio smiled as he answered, "As I said, I was waiting for you. I wanted to talk about something, but..." He looked up and down at Mr. L's nude form while chuckling uncomfortably. "Perhaps this is a bad time. Should I come back?"

Mr. L narrowed his eyes suspiciously. Never before had the jester come to his room for any reason other to annoy him. And he had _never_ wanted to just "talk" before. Something was definitely up. However, Mr. L couldn't deny that he was curious; even if this was a trick of some sort he was interested in seeing where it would lead. He would have to be cautious, though, lest he fall victim to another one of Dimentio's pranks.

"Just say whatever you want to say so I can get dressed." Mr. L would have preferred to get dressed first, but he figured this conversation wouldn't last too long anyway. Besides, the fact that Dimentio seemed to be just as, if not more, uncomfortable with the situation as he was made Mr. L feel a little better about the fact that he currently wore nothing more than a towel.

"A-are you sure–"

"This is only weird if you make it weird!" Mr. L snapped, feeling his face heat up. "Just spit it out already!"

"Er, alright. Well, what I wanted to talk about is... Um, I just wanted to tell you..." He sighed. "Sorry, this is kind of hard to say. Can I...can I trust you with a secret?"

Mr. L raised an eyebrow, wondering where this was going. "I guess so..."

"Good. The thing is..." He put a hand on his mask and after a moment of hesitation he took it off, revealing a rather feminine face that looked to be at least twenty years of age. "I'm...actually a girl."

Mr. L stared in disbelieve, unable to say a word. Was this the joke he had been anticipating? Was it even a joke? He wasn't so sure anymore. He waited for Dimentio to start laughing or crack a smile or give any kind of sign that this was just a joke, but he–no, _she_ , maintained a completely serious expression.

Dimentio tilted her head slightly and studied Mr. L with worried eyes. "Aren't you gonna say something?" she asked. Surprisingly, even though she had admitted to being a girl her voice didn't change at all. Was that really her natural voice?

"I, uh... You... This is..." Try as he might, Mr. L couldn't seem to form a full sentence. While this wasn't the most shocking thing he could have learned it was definitely surprising, and he had been caught so off guard by this reveal that it was hard to speak.

"I guess this _is_ a bit of a shock, isn't it?" Dimentio tugged at one of the bells on her hat. "I can explain everything, though."

Mr. L sensed a long story coming and decided it would be better if they had privacy, so he closed the bedroom door before sitting down on the bed next to the girl. It was then that he once again remembered he wasn't wearing any clothes. Blushing harder than he had in his life, he began to wish he _had_ gotten dressed first. Being half naked in front of Dimentio had been less weird when he thought she was a boy, but now that he knew the truth it felt plain wrong... He briefly considered at least throwing on a shirt, but was snapped out of his train of thought when Dimentio began to tell her story.

"I come from a long line of powerful magicians," she said, "and I was the first girl born into the family. My father didn't believe that women could be as powerful as men and wouldn't give me any lessons in magic. I knew I could be strong, though, so I got my older brother to secretly give me lessons for a while before I was able to hone my skills by myself. Then one day I knew I was ready to show my father everything I had learned. I was going to impress him and change his opinion on the strength of women."

Mr. L was finally able to speak. "So, what happened?"

Dimentio's neutral expression gave way to a sad one. "I...got nervous and messed up. I tried to summon a light breeze in the house, but instead I brought on a huge gust of wind and made a mess. After cleaning up I was sent to my room and forbidden to continue using magic." She made a fist with one hand and hit it against the palm of her other hand. "But I wasn't ready to give up. Magic was in my blood and I knew that I was meant to use it even though I was a girl. So I ran away to find a place where being a female magician was acceptable. As it turned out, though, there was no such place in my home dimension.

"After weeks of being mocked, laughed at, and having to sleep outside, I finally came to the conclusion that I had to make people think I was a boy if I wanted to be taken seriously. So I took to hiding my face behind a mask and wearing clothing that was a size too big to hide my small yet noticeable chest. I also magically altered my vocal cords so I would sound less feminine." She put a hand to her throat and winced, as if remembering the pain that likely came with doing such an act. But then she smiled, hand still around her neck. "When I could speak again, I borrowed my brother's name and set out once again to find a master for myself. This time it was easy, and my skills quickly improved once I had proper training."

Mr. L was thoroughly intrigued by this tale. It did explain quiet a few things about Dimentio, such as why she always kept her face hidden from everybody and wore that stupid dress which she had insisted on many occasions was a poncho. He didn't yet understand why she was telling him all of this, but he stayed quiet to hear the rest of the story.

"After a few years of training," Dimentio continued," my master said that there was nothing more he could teach me. By this time I could use powerful spells and even fight a little if I needed to; and this was in addition to being incredibly talented when it came to dimensional travel. So I left to explore other dimensions and put my skills to use. Soon after I left my master's house I met Count Bleck, and I've been using my magic to help him make perfect new worlds ever since." She finally removed her hand from her neck before turning to Mr. L with a smile. "And that's my story."

"Right... I, um, never would have guessed that you had to go through so much to be as strong as you are now." Mr. L looked at the girl curiously. "But...if you wanted your true gender to be a secret why are you telling me this? Are you going to tell the others, too?"

Dimentio's eyes widened, leaving her looking terrified. "No! Nobody else can know about this! They wouldn't take me seriously anymore if they knew..."

Frowning, Mr. L took her hands and held them gently. "That isn't true," he said. "Everyone here knows how good you are with magic and fighting. The fact that you're a girl doesn't change how powerful you are." He laughed. "I mean, look at Mimi. She looks like a normal little girl until you make her mad and start a fight with her. If you told everyone the truth they would understand that it's the same with you."

"Maybe. But still..." Dimentio blushed slightly. "I don't want to risk everyone treating me differently because I'm not exactly the person they think I am. P-promise me that this will stay between us, okay?"

"Okay, I promise. Nobody else will find out that you're a girl."

"Oh, thank you!" Dimentio threw her arms around the older man's body and hugged him tightly. "I knew I could trust you!"

Mr. L felt his face warming again but he returned the hug anyway, only in a more gentle manner. He had never been hugged like this by a girl and he had to admit that it was pretty nice. When their embrace ended a few moments later, he decided to try asking his first question again.

"Hey, why _did_ you tell me all that? I know you just said that you trust me, but out of all the people here why me?"

"I'm not really sure why I trust you so much," Dimentio said, "but I do. And I had to tell you the truth about me because of the last thing I have to confess." Her cheeks turned pink and she giggled nervously. "It's kind of embarrassing, but...I have a _huge_ crush on you, Mr. L."

Just when he thought his face couldn't get any warmer, those words made Mr. L's face feel like it was on fire. It was one thing to hear a girl confessing to having a crush on him, but to hear a girl with a low, male voice saying such a thing was completely different and made the whole thing seem all the more strange. Just like earlier, he found himself having trouble getting any words out. But he knew he had to say something, so he swallowed hard and spoke slowly, carefully choosing his words as he went.

"That's...flattering, I guess." he said.

"I know we haven't really gotten along since we met," Dimentio said, "and I know this is pretty sudden, but do you like me in the same way? Maybe just a little?"

"Uhhhh..." He didn't know what to say. He didn't want to hurt Dimentio's feelings, but he just wasn't looking to have that type of relationship with anyone right now. Especially not with one of his coworkers. He tried desperately to think of a safe way out of this mess, but his brain was still busy trying to comprehend everything he had learned in the past ten or so minutes.

Dimentio noticed his hesitation. "I know you weren't expecting the conversation to end up like this; maybe I should give you some time to think things over?"

"Yeah." Mr. L nodded. "I think that would be a good idea."

"Alright, then I guess I'd better leave now. But before I go, let me help you make up your mind."

Before Mr. L could ask what she meant by that, Dimentio leaned in and kissed him. Not just anywhere, though; she kissed him right on the lips. It was short and sweet, but to Mr. L, whose heart had started beating very quickly, it felt like it would never end. Not that he had much of a problem with that; it was, at the very least, enjoyable.

When it was over Dimentio sat up straight, putting some distance between their faces, and smirked. "Was that your first kiss, Mr. L?" Without waiting for an answer she put her mask back over her face and stood up to leave the room.

"Wa-wait," Mr. L said, feeling surprisingly warm all over given the fact that he only wore a towel. "You said that you're using your older brother's name, right?"

"I did."

"Will you tell me...your real name then?"

Dimentio shook her head. "Sorry, I don't think I should. What if you started using my real name when we're alone only to let it slip around someone else?"

"I won't do that! I won't even use your real name if you don't want me to. I mostly want to know because I'm curious."

The girl thought this over before saying with a smile, "Welll, okay. My real name is...Danielle."

With that, she left the room and closed the door behind her, leaving Mr. L to stare out at the space where she had been standing only moments ago.

"Danielle," he whispered to himself, smiling.

With a dreamy sort of sigh, he lay down on the bed and got lost in thoughts about the girl. He wasn't looking for love, but he couldn't deny how good it had felt when she hugged and kissed him. Maybe, just maybe...he could give Danielle a chance. Feeling a sudden chill, he frowned.

He was still naked.

* * *

 **I hope you didn't take any of this seriously, because this is a joke. April fools! :D  
**

 **For the record, "Danielle" was actually Mimi. She felt like trolling today. Or maybe she really _does_ have a crush on Mr. L. Hmm...**

 **I hope nobody hates me for this. Please don't hate me for writing this crackfic.**

 **~Dawn**


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